Counselling and Psychotherapy with Caryn Nuttall, Providing:
A UKCP accredited counsellor and psychotherapist with my own small, personal and friendly counselling practice in Central London
Counselling London:
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Relationship Counselling / Couples Counselling / Marriage GuidanceMy aim in therapy is to help the couple communicate; for each to listen and to understand what the other is saying. It's surprising how many of us don't. Very often problems occur when false assumptions are made with each partner having expectations that are not communicated to the other. Rather than talk, one partner might start to withdraw, turn off sex, and the domino effect of the breakdown begins. The key is communication and willingness to listen and to understand. Couples' counselling can be short-term work. The sooner the problems are addressed the better the chances of working them through. It is common for one partner in a relationship to be reluctant to see a counsellor, but in my experience they most often change their mind after the first session. The best time to start counselling, either individually or as a couple, is when one partner first starts to realise that they are withdrawing from the relationship. Frequently one partner may have been silently withdrawing from the relationship over an extended period of time, and then seemingly out-of-the-blue as far as the other is concerned, they announce their wish to separate. This news often comes as a shock to the other who had not picked up on there being such major problems. At this stage they often experience their partner as cold, withdrawn and unprepared to communicate. This can be because the withdrawing partner may have had years to prepare themselves for the dismantling of the relationship and have done their grieving, and possible feelings of guilt, privately and silently. The other partner meanwhile is left in emotional turmoil believing they have been living a lie. They cannot understand why their partner had not flagged the problems earlier to negotiate and to work through their issues together. Relationship counselling can cover various sorts of relationships. It can cover couple counselling, relationships with children, parents and friends. It also covers extra-marital affairs, or relationship issues in the workplace such as bullying. Counselling for other types of relationships varies according to the presenting problem, but low self-esteem is usually a common denominator. |
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